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Posts under ‘Dating & Relationships’

Family Conflict: How to Create a Safe Environment

couple yelling at each otherYour relationship should make you feel safe and secure.  It should be the kind of relationship that encourages good communication and understanding when a conflict arises.  However, you know that things don’t always go as you would like and sometimes nasty words are exchanged and you and your partner are hurt, confused and angry.

It’s during those trying times, you need to feel comfortable enough to discuss your issues, without feeling intimidated, wronged or invisible.  How do you create an environment that allows you each to speak your minds so a compromise can be established?

You first have to set down some guidelines about fair fighting. … CONTINUE READING

Tips for Being a Better Listener

Communication is the key to healthy relationships.  The less drama you have in your communicating, the happier you will be.  What that means is that you are not assuming things, generalizing, being disappointed when expectations aren’t met and living by “shoulds” or “ought tos.” Instead you are listening to your partner and expressing your needs and wants effectively.

How do you do that?

  • Good listening skills require you to respond to what you hear by saying, “It sounds like you feel…” and paraphrase what you think the person is feeling.  This indicates you heard and understood what was said.  Be open to the other person correcting you to make sure they are being heard properly. 
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Building Strong Relationships: How to Be Your Authentic Self

Virginia Satir, who pioneered the most effective work in family therapy states the following:

  • ¨”Say what you mean and mean what you say.  Ask for what you want but know you will not always get it.”
  • ¨”Be responsible for what you think, say and do rather than projecting it on others or denying it.”
  • ¨”Identify your “shoulds” as well as beliefs you have grown up with that keep you caught in craziness and are not necessarily true.”
  • ¨”Treat people as you would wish them to be rather than blaming them.”
  • ¨”Be open to receiving feedback from others and listen to it carefully because you might learn something about yourself from it.”
  • ¨”Be gentle and loving with yourself and others.”
  • ¨”Celebrate ‘differentness’ in people. 
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The Key to Making Relationships Last

Relationships are not always easy, and sometimes they take a lot of hard work, but it’s worth the effort.  Why?  Because a long-term committed relationship is fulfilling, satisfying, good for your health and just makes you feel happy. 

When you finally meet someone you think may be The One, you want to make sure the relationship lasts.  Here are a few ways to get the momentum going:photo

  1. As a couple, it can’t always be about your agenda. So be aware of how flexible you are, how understanding you are and how willing you are to see your partner’s perspective on things.
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Challenges for Women Dating Over 40

Anybody getting back in the dating world will find they encounter many challenges. But for women over 40, the challenges are different. After all, things have changed since they were in their 20’s, when life was more carefree and simple. Here are a few of the most common concerns when entering the dating world.

  1. I’m not a size 4. Will anyone be attracted to me? dating_rescue

If you think like this you need to do the inner work to get to a place of confidence and comfort with who you are. There are many women who are not strikingly beautiful, long or lean and yet they are married to wonderful men who love who they are and how they look.… CONTINUE READING