Independent Living for the Elderly

How lucky we are to be independent, active people, still in the prime of our lives. But one day, as we get older, we may have to deal with the dilemma my husband and I are now facing. We just took his mom to visit an independent living facility this week. I’m doing research for my mom, too, as they are both elderly. My mom (87), while still very active, gave up driving because of her macular degeneration. My mother-in-law (90) has difficulty getting around and uses a walker to shuffle through her 2000 square foot home. The question my husband and I are asking is, “When is the right time for them to move into these facilities?”

Both women are independent, so at this point, they need no assistance. However, we worry about their welfare and dread the day when there’s a crisis when we’re not around. This particular facility we looked at is very clean and includes many activities for the residents. They go on weekly field trips to shows, museums, and out to eat and there’s in-house entertainment on Saturday night and movies twice a day. With a full kitchen, they can even prepare some meals themselves, if they want.

As a boomer, I realize that one day my children will be concerned about my welfare and looking into facilities to keep me healthy and safe. It seems that if you live long enough, this question will come up. There are not many options to consider, however. There’s long term care insurance that will keep you in your home, with help, if you invest earlier enough to afford the costs. Some of us may live with our children, if it’s not too disruptive to their lives. The rest of us will have to consider the independent/assisted living option.

While we can’t predict the future, the key for us all is to stay as healthy as possible, for as long as possible and remain independent. My 92 year old aunt is at an independent facility and is having a wonderful time with her boyfriend and female friends. She goes out to eat, plays cards and socializes all day long with other residents. Fortunately for her, she is healthy and mobile.

Maybe by the time I reach the age where I have to consider my final options, there will be more choices available. In the meantime, my husband and I and our moms are deciding on the best options for them. Obviously we should still look forward to getting older, because even with all the uncertainties, it’s better than the alternative.